Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
