On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
