Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
