Plan B is the new Plan A
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
