They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
