how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
