our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
