White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
well, you know. whores of a feather.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize