Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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