youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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