Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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