if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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