Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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