So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
