So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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