There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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