I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
