i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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