HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
she smelled like a LAN party
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
