I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
