where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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