I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
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As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
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We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?