So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
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