Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
