More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
