just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
