whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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