Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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