is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
