We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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