Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
