You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Randomize
