Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
