I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Randomize
