i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Even the bartender felt bad for me
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax