Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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