i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
