found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
