Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?

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(412): Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went? http://tfl.nu/2c9n

Replies (22) Good night (2838) Bad night (714)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

dude i feel like shit

(413): View more from Massachusetts

well u did eat a lot of play-doh

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(412): dude i feel like shit (413): well u did eat a lot of play-doh http://tfl.nu/0jaq

Replies (10) Good night (1788) Bad night (4606)
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(124): View more from

Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.

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(124): Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all. http://tfl.nu/q25u

Replies (107) Good night (31996) Bad night (1497)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".

(781): View more from Massachusetts

It was only one, it doesn't count.

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(978): I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES". (781): It was only one, it doesn't count. http://tfl.nu/lfgz

Replies (30) Good night (1384) Bad night (4077)
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(347): View more from New York

sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.

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(347): sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things. http://tfl.nu/13io

Replies (36) Good night (8284) Bad night (1235)
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(408): View more from California

im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.

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(408): im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college. http://tfl.nu/q0uk

Replies (12) Good night (7316) Bad night (987)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.

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(307): They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting. http://tfl.nu/gm65

Replies (7) Good night (2705) Bad night (1162)
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(734): View more from Michigan

Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.

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(734): Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out. http://tfl.nu/s89t

Replies (9) Good night (3763) Bad night (742)
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(309): View more from Illinois

cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.

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(309): cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better. http://tfl.nu/6a1r

Replies (2) Good night (1155) Bad night (843)
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(503): View more from Oregon

He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.

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(503): He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain. http://tfl.nu/zlsy

Replies (2) Good night (1110) Bad night (384)
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(513): View more from Ohio

Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.

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(513): Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse. http://tfl.nu/2bnv

Replies (1) Good night (986) Bad night (463)
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(410): View more from Maryland

IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS

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(410): IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS http://tfl.nu/c2np

Replies (10) Good night (1000) Bad night (487)
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(386): View more from Florida

I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks

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(386): I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks http://tfl.nu/f8et

Replies (2) Good night (849) Bad night (253)
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(206): View more from Washington

Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"

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(206): Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon" http://tfl.nu/mddc

Replies (4) Good night (777) Bad night (222)
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(478): View more from Georgia

But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.

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(478): But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me. http://tfl.nu/3lii

Replies (2) Good night (574) Bad night (177)

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