Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Randomize
