Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Randomize
