You work out of a Hotel?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I need water and some morals
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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