I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
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