What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
wanna go halves on a baby?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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