It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
he thought i was a dude.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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