Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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