This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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