she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize