No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
