we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize