"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize
